Woes on singlehood

Posted on: December 8, 2006

I watched the fireworks from Greenbelt kissed the melancholy of the night away by the window of this dark and empty office room. I was with my friend Chin, but for the very first time, I felt so alone. Jolina Magdangal was singing ‘Maybe It’s You’ in the background and baduy as it may seem, but I felt its melodies tugging at the strings of my heart for no apparent reason. I don’t even have a YOU to refer to.

It’s been a while and it feels like forever. This singlehood, I mean. It sounds so pathetic but I really can’t help but think why the hell am I still single. Sure, I have had a couple of (actually just one serious and the others… ewan) relationships. I guess I just miss the feeling of being wooed and that can’t eat-can’t sleep-reach for the stars-over the fence-world series kind of thing when being in-LIKE. Yup, not even in-love. But hey, the latter’s way way sweeter. The other one’s just cute.

Am I being bitter? Probably, but in my defense, I think I am just being normal. Geez, I’m already 24 (malapit na ko sa finish line!) Actually my finish line is 28. So I guess that gives me four more years to find the man I would marry. Seriously. I want to be married by that time. But it seems so soon that I’d rather forget about it.

Just some thoughts.

1. I don’t want to be an old maid.
2. I miss kissing someone (hehe… seriously.)
3. I want to have a baby (“,)

I guess I’ve been watching too much Korean soap that I’m beginning to be disillusioned and make myself believe that I can meet my ‘Seungwan’ anytime, any place unimaginable. That I too, can just bump into him from an airport somewhere abroad and we’ll have a few rows, get drunk, discover in the morning that we just had a one night stand, have a baby, marry despite our utter dislikes of each other and then fall in love in the end. Perfect. But it’s fiction… not true. Not me.

Hell, I wish.

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