Posted on: April 17, 2006

I’m currently pissed off at myself. I know it’s the last thing a person should feel (because if you won’t love yourself, whoelse will, ‘ayt?). I feel like I’m being a pathological liar to my own self. i keep denying things, emotions, feelings… whatever. I feel like I’m masking whatever it is that’s inside me. There is nothing more sad than feeling sad within yourself and showing others how happy you are on the outside. Not that I am being sad or anything but I’m not just my old happy self anymore and I really really miss it. I hate being like this. I hate how I usually find myself staring at nothing for what seemed like an eternity without anything on my mind really. Geez, do I need medical attention?
I hate thinking how I felt like I found myself in someone and lost it all at the same time. I did not die; I am hibernating. I am loving the serenity of my own world — my peace.
Can I ever ever come back?


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April 2006
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